Breastfeeding in public- an honest reflection of a 38G

Just know that posting this is out of my comfort zone folks but I do it for good reason.

When I had my first child I knew that I wanted to breastfeed, and in the comfort of my own home without a cover and without any judgments from passerby's it was still a struggle. One because we were still learning from each other and two because breastfeeding with larger breasts can be difficult for a first time mom and a small baby. It was probably at that time I became VERY self conscious of my breast size. I would be so envious of smaller busted women, bc when they breastfed without a cover they could still remain for the most part covered bc their babies heads would obstruct anyone else's view. Definitely not the case for me. And can we just get real- COVERS are the WORST!!! I'm already lugging around everything I own in a diaper bag, because I'm the kind of first time parent that doesn't even know what the unknown could be and I must prepare for any and all things. So digging out a breastfeeding cover during a sermon on Sunday morning (as contents such as heavy flow menstrual pads, nipple cream and diapers roll across floor) was not ideal. Then something glorious happened. My oldest became a breastfeeding champion, and not only that it also became a hobby for him of sorts. Truly one of the only places he was happy was at the breast, and I just knew when I would look down at him "that he needed this, and that I needed this." And we flourished together.

Isn't it crazy how something that could cause such insecurity would be one of the things that I needed most. Breastfeeding at its best is both vulnerable and empowering, sounds kind of familiar because parenting at its best and worst will always flip your perspective, and you, on your head.

I will be forever grateful for the gift that has-(and still does for my youngest) provided nourishment, comfort, bonding and confidence to my babies.

So if you can gain anything from this post please come away with this- our bodies and our babies are amazing no matter the size shape or color, and if we trust in the truth that we are all so beautifully made then breastfeeding will take you on the most beautiful journey. Also if you catch someone staring, or someone has something to say know that the problem is with them not with you, and truly the only concern you have to have is that your baby is fed so ignore all that other trash.